I am average student completed my under-grad and grad studies successfully. I am doing PhD since 4.5 years.

I was a hard-working student. I was a self-motivated student wanted to do PhD and stay in Academia. I was hoping somehow my work will help to world.

If I compare playing tennis to a PhD studies, I feel like my advisor is breaking my racket to motivate me and I cannot keep up with a broken racket, which is my will to move on.

These are the some stuff that my advisor told me multiple times, which I cannot forget or over-write them:

• "You disappointed and hurt me. I don't know what am I going to do with you."
• "You are a turtle. You can't even graduate in 20-30 years"
• "You are bad at time management and always lost in details."
• "Your model is junk. I won't write my name on top of this model."
• "I am giving you F to motivate you. I trust you keep working"
• "Even high-school students won't make the mistakes you do. Should I keep going?" [Me]: "No, please don't."
• He threw a book at me and told me that: "You should learned from it"
• He keep showing his other students Ph.D. saying: "See how good they are writing, you should write like them."
• To other lectures, he told that: "I start to understand the way he thinks and explains his work after 4 years. He is very complex"

Everything boiled up when I get F from my progress on my PhD studies. All lead to depression and anxiety.

Overall, I am not blaming my advisor, instead I always blame myself that:

• Why I started this journey?
• Where did I do wrong?
• If I have chosen a different advisor, would it be the same?

All these let me to realize that I actually not capable enough mentally and emotionally to be successful in PhD or even in any job from now on.

=> Should I conclude that I am not capable enough to do PhD with the words of my advisor? or Should I give myself another chance?

Note: If this is not a proper question to ask, I can delete right away.