118

Unless you have some direct relationship with his father, this is not something we'd normally do in US, UK, or Australian culture. (I'm not sure if it's the same everywhere in the EU.) A polite option might be to tell your advisor something like "I'm very sorry to hear about your father, please let me know if there is anything I can do." If your advisor is ...


93

I don't know what field you're in, but in mine, writing such a paper would be viewed as unnecessary and perhaps a bit strange. You seem to feel that you don't deserve your place with this supervisor, and so you need to prove your worth, or impress them, by writing a paper. This is unecessary, as you have already impressed them with your project idea and PhD ...


76

It sounds to me that this is just the reaction of that particular professor, and so there's not much you can do about it. Perhaps the professor only likes to use LinkedIn to connect with other researchers and professors, but personally I don't believe that it's unprofessional or inappropriate for university students to connect with professors. You are both ...


75

Campus police is in charge of keeping everyone on campus safe -- both from other members of the university as well as people outside the university. They're your first point of contact, and if the email can be construed as a threat, then they should take it seriously. If they think that they require help from outside, they will refer the matter to the city ...


56

I think you should talk to the group leader about the appropriateness of an acknowledgment for the drawing (not coauthorship). This is the right course of action for any contributor. The fact that she's your wife is not relevant, and should not be a part of this professional conversation. How to approach the group leader depends on how you usually interact. ...


48

tl;dr: your lecturer is right in principle. Commit time and effort to your project and try to be creative. In higher education, students are expected to develop the skills which enable them to apply a number of techniques, compare the results, evaluate their effectiveness, synthesise new methods, or even suggest new approaches to a problem. Your lecturer is ...


45

I have worked with supervisors who are very humble while successful to those who are extremely egoistic due to their accomplishments. In my personal opinion, it is not wise to give Godly status to any person. He is your PhD supervisor, a famous one, but there are thousands of famous people in this world. And fame is subjective. Be professional, be polite and ...


42

You should ask the professor to describe your contribution to the database and the relationship between the database and the publication. No matter what the reason is that you are not an author on the publication, there is no benefit to including the reason in your letter of recommendation. A correction to the author list could benefit you, but only someone ...


41

It may help to remember that professors are only human. You might be looking for "forgiveness" or "justice," but professors are neither priests nor judges; they are researchers. Now they are moving on with their lives, and so must you; for better or worse, this incident is done. Bearing in mind that professors are human, I think many of your questions can ...


38

Yea that's rubbish - most academics have huge networks on Linked In. Many of their contacts are former students who have remained active in their field. This is particularly the case among graduate students and academics in their department. Personally I think if an undergrad made the effort to connect on Linked In I would take that as a sign that they were ...


31

Asking them directly to acknowledge "forgetting" you is a battle that you cannot win, I am afraid. However, if you approach this strategically, you can still probably get a letter that bears the same message as being acknowledged on the paper would. From your description it seems safe to assume that your authorship was omitted accidentally. It is a ...


30

The situation is the same in the EU as it is in the US. You should generally not go visit unless you are close to your supervisor's father personally. If your supervisor has let you know about their father's situation, a reply similar to the one in Geoffrey Brent's answer is a good way to go. If you want to show polite interest, you can after some time ...


22

First, to answer the question directly, supervisors have much more to gain from successful students than unsuccessful ones. Among other things, success brings them new students and future collaborators. Most of us are very proud of our successful students and, we hope, they have good feelings toward us, as well. The failures just disappear. Moreover, I ...


22

Here I quote the crux of your situation, and put in bold font your sentence containing a question: "I sent a connect request to one of the professors I had last semester (along with some other profs, most of whom accepted) and he just wrote back to me saying it is extremely unprofessional to be trying to connect on LinkedIn for a student/prof relationship....


21

In any collaboration, some degree of imbalance is inevitable. I've been on both sides of the matter, and the question I've always used to guide my collaboration decision is: "Are all of the collaborating parties benefiting from the relationship?" There are a lot of ways to evaluate this question, some very pragmatic and some very personal. Here are ...


18

I agree with other answers. Having said that, if the father does pass away, and if it is in the same town, you may want to go to the memorial service or funeral, as this is a way to show support for the living. Going with a group of students would also be fine.


18

TL;DR: There is one principle in asking forgiveness. If the other side decides to grant it, they will do it under the premise that, from now on, things will change. You have to convince them that this incident will not repeat. This takes time which you didn't give them. By pushing them into situations which you are interested in (adopting you as grad ...


17

My first impression of what you describe is that the instructor tries to achieve two things: he wants to avoid teaching you to write long reports, which could be a good thing; there are many fields where writing long reports should not be a priority. he is gradually allowing more freedom as students progress through the curriculum. The latter is what I ...


17

It is totally fine to connect with your professors on Linkedin. You don't have to chat with them or comment on every post they upload but it is good to stay connected via social media in a professional way. I used to get requests from my professors on Facebook and LinkedIn, so I knew that they like to stay in touch somehow with good students. But again, try ...


17

The same happened to me. I stayed friendly towards everybody and participated in both groups. I think it worked for me. It leaves all doors open. I think a key point is never agreeing with any bad-mouthing, ever. Sometimes this is socially difficult. I would play dumb and say "Oh" or "I understand", but never "You're right" or &...


16

Even though you have not indicated where your Ph.D. studies are going to be, it is clear from your description of your advisor's behavior that he is not expecting special deference to him. I would say that the way to show him respect is to trust him when he says "don't do that." Then learn as much as you can in the program, and accomplish great ...


15

Disclaimer: Customs and individual preferences can differ, and this is my best guess. I wouldn't recommend that you show particular deference to your advisor, just because he is famous. Be respectful and polite of course, and deferential to some extent, but it's not necessary to be more so than if your advisor was lesser-known. I wouldn't recommend ...


15

If you're in mathematics, then these kinds of feuds are unusual enough that the best strategy is simply to move to a different subsubfield that doesn't have them. (If you're a PhD student just starting research, just do something else; if you're more established, it's fine to gradually move into a neighboring area.) Even if you manage to succeed despite ...


14

While I cannot relate to your story in the academia setting, it is something I can in my personal life, which for myself I attribute to behaviours like rumination, which in turn all stem from emotional dysregulation. As others have stressed, since every subsequent engagement with the professor has led to more stress and anxiety for you, that isn't the ...


13

It would of course be a tremendous feather in your cap to be a coauthor, even one of zillions, of an article in a prestigious journal. And even if not a coauthor, it is personally satisfying to be acknowledged. However, no one else pays much attention to acknowledgements. What you now need to achieve is fair recognition of your contributions in the letter of ...


11

As long as you wait until after the semester is over and final grades have been assigned before asking her out, you are on clear grounds ethically. Personally I find the idea no less reasonable than the idea of asking anyone else out. You are both adults. She will either be interested or not. You will never know unless you ask her. A good friend of mine ...


11

5h commute a day for 2 weeks is not acceptable, pandemic or not. To play it tactfully, I would ask the supervisor to pay for accommodation there for these 2 weeks. This will force your supervisor to: pay for it, so reconsider whether it is worth it. if she pays officially for it, she must check whether that trip is authorized by the university considering ...


11

I agree with the answers here stating that LinkedIn is fine for creating a professional connection (as opposed to Facebook, Instagram etc.) One important point- when sending an invite request, make sure you write a personalized note. Explain that you want to connect on LinkedIn for the purpose of developing network of professionals in your field, which ...


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