Questions tagged [interpersonal-issues]

Questions concerning relationships and dealing with problems between people.

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4
votes
2answers
995 views

Should an intern who wrote most of a paper and where the first author contributed little request to be first author?

Background: A little over a year ago, I wrote a paper for an internship (during high school) at a major university medical center. My contribution to the paper was basically everything except ...
14
votes
6answers
7k views

How can I fix a relationship with a professor that has recently cooled?

What would be a good way to overcome bad experiences with a professor in my department, who is not my main advisor, but from whom I would like to get advice regularly? During the first year of my PhD,...
7
votes
1answer
315 views

Got denied authorship on paper; neither university nor publisher feel responsible

I helped another graduate student with her work. We were testing how long certain drugs lasted in mouse organs. We dosed three drugs and sent them to some collaborators for analysis. Time passes. My ...
3
votes
1answer
395 views

How to deal with a team colleague submiting a bad article? [closed]

My friend and I have been researching on a topic since when we were doing our master degrees. We were preparing to submit the next chapter of the research to a publication (we already have an article ...
3
votes
2answers
726 views

What to do if a coauthor lies?

My coauthor and I work at some organization. After I started working with him, people told me that he allegedly took some data (used in the paper) from the organization without authorization (He was ...
42
votes
7answers
17k views

What can I do if a student in my lab threatens to tell lies about me, and my advisor doesn't want to fire her?

I'm doing my Masters right now and I am a new lab member (I've been there for just 4 months). A undergrad student didn't like it when I told her to follow biosafety rules when handling dangerous ...
1
vote
1answer
410 views

How to write a letter declining a supervisor offer?

I have written a proposal to a supervisor for asking a letter of support in order to apply for a PhD research grant. First, I emailed to supervisor A but no respond for two weeks. Then, I tried to ...
2
votes
2answers
2k views

How to inform an emotionally abusive advisor I don't want to work with him?

I am an incoming PhD student. Before I applied, I chose a particular school because it had a specific PI. (Of course, this is not a good idea, but I did not know better at the time.) The PI is very ...
5
votes
1answer
256 views

Advisor wants me to come up with a research project. I came up with a project, but it's not with him

I'm in the second half of my PhD, and my advisor wants me to come up with an original research project. I also have a mentor (who is not a professor at my university) who has also been telling me to ...
108
votes
8answers
13k views

What should I do if my advisor is forcing me to vote on a specific candidate in IEEE elections?

The IEEE holds yearly elections for senior positions in its societies. Every member of the IEEE has the right to vote in these elections, including me. My advisor, however, has candidates who, for one ...
38
votes
2answers
1k views

How do I politely and tactfully tell my advisor that I would like more consistency in meetings?

I am a PhD student. My advisor is great, but like all academics is very busy (administrative duties, other students, research...). What happens almost every time I try to have a meeting, since the ...
4
votes
2answers
623 views

Etiquette: Interrupting your supervisor having a meeting

I'm doing an internship as a high school student in a lab and am wondering about etiquette in research/life. The problem is that I interrupted my supervisor while he was having a meeting to tell him ...
3
votes
2answers
461 views

How should I approach a situation where my head of department doesn't want me there?

I'm in my first year of a PhD programme in the UK. In this year of the programme we do a few short projects with different supervisors and then choose a supervisor and project for the next 3 years. ...
38
votes
5answers
29k views

Any ethical problems with dating a former student?

Assume the student recently graduated but works nearby; has not been my student for over 1 year; has never expressed any interest in dating until very recently; has a father who is a coworker at my ...
6
votes
6answers
2k views

My advisor wants to co-author a paper on my thesis work, but drags out the submission, claiming it isn't ready. Should I submit without him?

I have just finished my PhD thesis defense in applied mathematics. My supervisor suggested me the initial problem. He was not an expert in the small area that I was working, and thus the assistance ...
8
votes
2answers
757 views

Faculty criticizing students in front of other students

As a graduate student, I often discuss the performance and abilities of undergraduates in very frank terms with fellow graduate students. However, I would never do so in front of other undergraduates. ...
4
votes
4answers
1k views

How to avoid crossing my advisor if I write a paper as a sole author?

A bit of a controversial question here. I am a PhD student currently away from campus on an internship in another state (in the US). I left campus with my advisor-provided laptop and some dataset I ...
328
votes
12answers
50k views

I don't want to kill any more mice, but my advisor insists that I must in order to get my PhD

When my supervisor pitched the PhD to me, it was all about analyzing "big data". I had BSc/MSc experience in wet-lab biology (mainly culturing cells), however I wanted to branch out into ...
9
votes
1answer
1k views

How to confront new office mate regarding personal hygiene? [closed]

I am a senior graduate student and share an office with 3 other post-docs and graduate students. We recently had a first year graduate student join our lab for a rotation and he has been placed in ...
60
votes
11answers
11k views

My advisor demands second authorship, but my collaborator contributed much more than him. I don't want to be unethical, what should I do?

My PhD supervisor has contributed 0% to my research and he even does not know the basics of my research. On the other hand, I have a collaborator from another university who has contributed ...
9
votes
4answers
2k views

How to handle rude and distracting fellow graduate student who sits in the same office?

In a nutshell, I hate one of my fellow PhD students. I am sitting in the office with that fellow graduate student who frequently interrupts me when I want to focus on my work. He also often is very ...
208
votes
11answers
43k views

Have I embarassed my supervisors by solving a problem that a PhD student in my group was working on without success?

I'm a bachelor student in mathematics writing my thesis at a small university in the US. A PhD student that has the same supervisor has spent a very significant amount of time working exclusively on a ...
37
votes
3answers
4k views

Should I not hire someone who does not get along with me?

When I was doing my postdoc, there was a PhD student who shared the same office with me; he didn't get along very well with me or anyone in the office. He could be described as unfriendly and a little ...
11
votes
10answers
8k views

Should I ask my online PhD interview panel whether my partner can sit in?

I have an online interview for a PhD program via Skype. I want to ask the panel if my girlfriend can join in the interview. She will turn off her microphone and camera, so there will no interrupting ...
9
votes
2answers
520 views

How should you approach your adviser and tell him that he has a communication problem

(Not his actual hand writing) I am currently working under an academic research adviser who is a very nice person and very knowledgeable but I think he has problem in communicating with others (...
22
votes
3answers
4k views

How to quit/put on hold a PhD program due to personality clash with advisor?

I've been trying to cope with a very abusive and mentally unstable advisor. In a recent clash she has been spewing lies and threats. It has become clearer and clearer that despite the four years of ...
16
votes
3answers
1k views

If a reference/book authored by your professor contains typos, how should you react?

My professor gave me a module on history that contains several spelling and grammatical errors. Should I tell him about this or just ignore these mistakes?
14
votes
2answers
931 views

How should I deal with being harassed by my supervisor in a non-work situation?

I'm a female student in some huge and popular university in my country. I have a supervisor who is much older then me. He is a very respected person in our community. We worked together a lot, it ...
1
vote
1answer
355 views

Is it alright not to include my previous supervisors as co-authors, when publishing PhD work, now that I graduated?

I completed my PhD almost a year ago. I had 3 advisers for my PhD research and I could say that all the three hardly had any idea what I was doing. During my PhD days, I used to write papers and ...
2
votes
1answer
437 views

Seeking a permanent job during a postdoc in a different country/continent: official and moral responsibilities

I'm going to refer two countries/continents as X and Y. I'm citizen of neither. A week back, I started my third year of postdoc in X (with no teaching duties), after living two years for my first two ...
82
votes
13answers
13k views

How to deal with a nosy fellow graduate student?

There is another graduate student at my school working in the same area as me that is extremely nosy about my work. His curiosity definitely goes beyond the normal amount of "What are you working on?" ...
0
votes
2answers
1k views

How do you go about asking your advisor/research assistant supervisor for a week off? [closed]

Spring break is coming up and I plan on taking that week off to go traveling in Europe. Do I ask my supervisor/advisor for permission or do I just inform them that I am doing so? Do I do it via ...
0
votes
1answer
735 views

Hobby during PhD studies has taken its toll, how do I recover? [closed]

In the first two years of my PhD I made a big mistake by spending a large amount and passion on a hobby (making video games). In this hobby, I saw an opportunity to make this into a career, either by ...
80
votes
20answers
16k views

How to deal with a colleague who always puts you down?

I am just starting out my PhD which will take 5 years to complete and I am dealing with a person in my own research group who cannot stop putting me down every chance she gets. In our research ...
7
votes
4answers
2k views

Primary Investigator gets really nervous around me?

My new Primary Investigator, who is well respected in her field, gets really nervous when talking to me for some reason. We are the same gender and both married so it's not a problem of that sort... ...
5
votes
1answer
331 views

What to do if you have a troubled relation with your postdoc supervisor? [closed]

It seems my relation with my postdoc supervisor has hit troubled waters after an amazing start. Things started to turn towards the worse since our first publication together, particularly after I took ...
35
votes
12answers
8k views

My undergraduate research advisor pressures me to work more hours than I want to, but I don't want to risk ruining the relationship. How to proceed?

I am burned out and exhausted and need a place to rant and get advice. =( I am an undergraduate student majoring in Information Systems who was hired a few months ago to work in a Human-Computer ...
5
votes
2answers
437 views

What to do when one my co-authors is openly insulting me but the others remain silent?

I previously asked this question Senior co-author is jeopardizing two years of work. I have been trying to address my senior co-author's concerns. However, he is still not happy, and has now started ...
4
votes
3answers
1k views

How to avoid my advisor as a reference? [closed]

I had a bad relationship with my advisor. He told me evidently that he won’t write the recommendation letter for me in the future. Of course, I will not put him in my reference list in my future ...
4
votes
1answer
582 views

I had a “quarrel” with my bachelor thesis advisor, should I ask him to be my one of my referees for grad application?

Last year this happened to me : I have asked a professor if he were available for being my graduate thesis advisor, now my bachelor thesis advisor is angry with me After that, I decided to apologize ...
5
votes
1answer
419 views

Supervisor doesn't give me a chance to contribute more and gives himself first authorship, how to approach this?

My supervisor proposed a test, just a concept and I designed the experiment and executed the lab work all by myself. After the experiment was done and I presented the data (in nice figures and ...
22
votes
9answers
5k views

I can't trust my supervisor anymore, but have to have his letter of recommendation. What should I do?

Background I did my masters research project with Prof X. While doing this I joined his lab, where he used to ask me to do random tasks i.e. taking part in different projects, conducting lectures to ...
49
votes
4answers
7k views

A frequent reviewer seems to have a grudge against me. What to do?

(Asking on behalf of a friend.) I work in math, in a field where reviews are not double-blind: reviewers are anonymous, but review copies of papers include attribution. I’ve received several reviews ...
21
votes
2answers
2k views

Co-author conflict after paper got accepted

I am a PhD student. My paper got accepted with minor changes and then re-submitted again and accepted by the journal. In the meantime, I had conflicts with my supervisor who is a co-author of my ...
52
votes
7answers
12k views

Student wants to show everybody how much he knows

I have read this question, where the OP asked how to handle silly questions. In the excellent answer of Irwin, the 6th point attracted my attention: If it's a matter of the student talking on and ...
12
votes
4answers
431 views

How can I get the opportunity to talk during my meetings with professors?

I am a PhD student and often I will meet with my advisor and our collaborators. But they always do all the talking even though I am the only one writing code. And sometimes I will try to ask a ...
19
votes
6answers
4k views

Teaching a student (as a TA) when there is flirting, etc. and mutual interest

I am a graduate student with an assistantship. I met an undergraduate and we hit it off (talking about sex, but not sex with each other). But now I assist a class with her (and I'm not good at hiding ...
4
votes
2answers
791 views

What should I do if I believe my former advisor is alleging to journal editors that I have copied his study?

I have been through many different things with my previous advisor. He wrote publications with my research proposal with his former female student after forcing me to give up the topic. Also, as ...
16
votes
3answers
839 views

Is there a code of ethics for Ph.D. supervisors?

I'm a Ph.D. student in Germany, I got my M.Sc. degree in Finland, I have friends in different countries doing their Ph.D.s, especially in the US, and there are also my fellow students in our group. So ...
29
votes
1answer
1k views

What can I do if I wrote a grant proposal with a professor, and now that it is funded he refuses to hire me?

I discussed my ideas with a professor at a university here in China, where I live. He said that I should write a grant proposal and he will submit it, and if he gets a grant he will hire me (as a ...