Questions tagged [interpersonal-issues]

Questions concerning relationships and dealing with problems between people.

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8
votes
1answer
390 views

Professor got me involved into working with him, but the experience was poor. How can I avoid him without facing negative consequences?

I am an undergraduate, #1 in my year in terms of GPA, and one of my professors asked me if I was interested to help him with a research competition. The goal was to publish a paper and hopefully win a ...
5
votes
1answer
540 views

Why is it that when I tell people outside my university that I'm a PhD student, I am sometimes told that I'm arrogant/privileged/ignorant? [closed]

This did not occur before I started my PhD. It does not occur when I simply say I’m a graduate student. I only say this when people ask what I do as a living (I do not namedrop this). This tends to ...
8
votes
1answer
296 views

PhD thesis submission

I am a sixth year female PhD student in the CS department of a renowned US university. I have had a very difficult time with my adviser for the past two years due to personal and research conflicts. ...
28
votes
4answers
6k views

Postdoc application: professor verbally committed to hire me, but now says that regulations have changed and keeps delaying the process

I applied for a post doctoral position a few months ago. The initial response from the professor in charge was warm and enthusiastic and he even made a verbal commitment to hire me. But then he just ...
58
votes
5answers
18k views

How to handle a student who will not accept that he is wrong?

I am a university marker TA, and after midterm exam I met with a student who would not accept that he was wrong. He thought his answers were correct but didn't explain to me why his answers were ...
5
votes
1answer
549 views

Main author might want to exclude me from the list of authors

About a year ago, a foreign researcher invited me to co-author a review paper with him. He had already a 50 page long draft that needed editing and improving. After I was done with it (literature ...
10
votes
1answer
1k views

Being accepted then rejected to an academic conference

I submitted an abstract and received notification of acceptance to present at a conference. The notification of acceptance asked for a short bio. I provided the bio and was asked to provide more ...
5
votes
1answer
829 views

Remind professor of email a second time?

Disclaimer: I know there are some similar questions around. However, I don't feel like the answers there suit this situation completely. This is why I am asking. Some backstory (not necessarily ...
6
votes
3answers
1k views

In-class, allowing students to address professor informally ('tutoyer' / 'tutear')

Supposing that Dr. A is teaching an undergraduate-level course, what would be the pros and cons for Dr. A to allow students to address himself in an "informal" manner? By "informal" here I mean ...
5
votes
1answer
589 views

Supervisor insists on writing a manuscript, yet procrastinates on writing for years

So my supervisor insisted on writing a manuscript himself (because he wants to submit the paper to a better journal), but constantly procrastinated on the task for one and a half years despite ...
3
votes
1answer
437 views

How to restore trust in a toxic lab environment?

A friend of mine started working in a biology research lab where several research groups share space and lab equipment. Recently the environment has become quite toxic as the people started to ...
61
votes
4answers
6k views

How can I assist other graduate students who may feel increasingly “unwelcome” due to their countries of origin?

I work in a research group with a large number of international graduate students. Recent news in my country (the United States) has been deeply unsettling for some of these students, especially the ...
5
votes
2answers
790 views

Dealing with suspects of sabotaging experiments

In a group, postdoc A believes postdoc B sabotaged her experiments. A shares her frustration with the PI (without proof) in a "half-jokingly, half-serious" sense. Since then, strange things appear to ...
13
votes
3answers
2k views

How do I stay motivated in my PhD research when my advisor doesn't seem to like me very much?

My PhD advisor and I simply do not get along. I think it has a lot to do with the language and cultural barriers (we are in Germany). We had an argument this week that almost led to me quitting, but ...
15
votes
4answers
2k views

What can be done about an unintentionally disruptive classmate?

I have a classmate who frequently disrupts class by asking nonsensical or unrelated questions, or by making nonsensical or unrelated interjections to the professor. He is autistic, and all the ...
21
votes
5answers
7k views

What do I do if my supervisor insists that the classical CLT is false and wants me to write that in my paper?

We are in a physics department. My supervisor, upon reading a Physical Review Letters (PRL) paper, concludes (and claims that the paper also concludes) that the classical central limit theorem (CLT) ...
3
votes
2answers
652 views

How to work effectively with unengaging labmates as a graduate student?

This might seem like a small problem, but one I've been thinking about lately, and was hoping for some insights. I joined a new lab around a year ago, and while things have mostly been going great, my ...
7
votes
2answers
687 views

Discussion turned into argument with the conference keynote speaker, would it be appropriate to email an apology? [closed]

I had a chance to visit as an audience to an international conference in computer science. As usual, there were few keynotes before the scheduled paper presentation is carried out for the day. During ...
47
votes
15answers
22k views

How to professionally handle sexist remarks by a student?

Suppose that you noticed a student saying a sexist remark to you, and the student is completely unaware of it. In the spirit of fighting sexism, I feel that I should maybe say something. But on the ...
15
votes
1answer
1k views

Should a lecturer be friendly with students?

I have been thinking about this question for a while and did a few googling here and there; but, didn't get anything good. Probably, academia could help. I am early in my teaching career as a ...
0
votes
1answer
109 views

Who should I tell about switching a group-based course to pass/no credit?

First, some background: I'm currently involved in a course which is based around a major group project. However, the end of the semester is coming up, and I honestly can't see this project becoming ...
6
votes
2answers
1k views

I got mad at my advisor?

Without going into the details, I got a little irritated and frustrated with my advisor today. I've been feeling myself slowly losing respect for her as a manager, but have remained professional and ...
9
votes
5answers
634 views

How to score class participation, correcting for natural outspokenness?

When my students ask questions and participate in discussion, class is more thoughtful, more fun, and more effective. I encourage their participation by checking in with them regularly, and making ...
11
votes
2answers
7k views

How should one deal with fellow students constantly asking for notes?

I'm an undergraduate student in the Netherlands, and as the title states, I'm encountering an annoying situation. How should one deal with the situation of constantly being asked for the notes of a ...
15
votes
4answers
2k views

How can a student stop/report conversations with a professor that make her uncomfortable, while avoiding negative consequences for the student?

I have some concerns about the behavior of a professor whose class I am taking, Professor A. First, Professor A has been trying to involve me in his attempts to get another professor in the ...
13
votes
1answer
1k views

How to deal with an arrogant advisor

My advisor is a highly regarded scientist in his field. However, that also made him a very arrogant person. I have two things I desperately need help with: Research projects My advisor becomes more ...
15
votes
3answers
1k views

How do I help minimize interruptions during group meetings as a student?

The project I work on has numerous members -- several graduate students, a couple of postdocs, and my advisor. We meet every other week to discuss progress and update one another on our status. Almost ...
4
votes
2answers
1k views

Should an intern who wrote most of a paper and where the first author contributed little request to be first author?

Background: A little over a year ago, I wrote a paper for an internship (during high school) at a major university medical center. My contribution to the paper was basically everything except ...
14
votes
6answers
7k views

How can I fix a relationship with a professor that has recently cooled?

What would be a good way to overcome bad experiences with a professor in my department, who is not my main advisor, but from whom I would like to get advice regularly? During the first year of my PhD,...
7
votes
1answer
328 views

Got denied authorship on paper; neither university nor publisher feel responsible

I helped another graduate student with her work. We were testing how long certain drugs lasted in mouse organs. We dosed three drugs and sent them to some collaborators for analysis. Time passes. My ...
3
votes
1answer
398 views

How to deal with a team colleague submiting a bad article? [closed]

My friend and I have been researching on a topic since when we were doing our master degrees. We were preparing to submit the next chapter of the research to a publication (we already have an article ...
3
votes
2answers
732 views

What to do if a coauthor lies?

My coauthor and I work at some organization. After I started working with him, people told me that he allegedly took some data (used in the paper) from the organization without authorization (He was ...
42
votes
7answers
17k views

What can I do if a student in my lab threatens to tell lies about me, and my advisor doesn't want to fire her?

I'm doing my Masters right now and I am a new lab member (I've been there for just 4 months). A undergrad student didn't like it when I told her to follow biosafety rules when handling dangerous ...
1
vote
1answer
474 views

How to write a letter declining a supervisor offer?

I have written a proposal to a supervisor for asking a letter of support in order to apply for a PhD research grant. First, I emailed to supervisor A but no respond for two weeks. Then, I tried to ...
2
votes
2answers
2k views

How to inform an emotionally abusive advisor I don't want to work with him?

I am an incoming PhD student. Before I applied, I chose a particular school because it had a specific PI. (Of course, this is not a good idea, but I did not know better at the time.) The PI is very ...
5
votes
1answer
261 views

Advisor wants me to come up with a research project. I came up with a project, but it's not with him

I'm in the second half of my PhD, and my advisor wants me to come up with an original research project. I also have a mentor (who is not a professor at my university) who has also been telling me to ...
108
votes
8answers
13k views

What should I do if my advisor is forcing me to vote on a specific candidate in IEEE elections?

The IEEE holds yearly elections for senior positions in its societies. Every member of the IEEE has the right to vote in these elections, including me. My advisor, however, has candidates who, for one ...
38
votes
2answers
2k views

How do I politely and tactfully tell my advisor that I would like more consistency in meetings?

I am a PhD student. My advisor is great, but like all academics is very busy (administrative duties, other students, research...). What happens almost every time I try to have a meeting, since the ...
4
votes
2answers
636 views

Etiquette: Interrupting your supervisor having a meeting

I'm doing an internship as a high school student in a lab and am wondering about etiquette in research/life. The problem is that I interrupted my supervisor while he was having a meeting to tell him ...
3
votes
2answers
487 views

How should I approach a situation where my head of department doesn't want me there?

I'm in my first year of a PhD programme in the UK. In this year of the programme we do a few short projects with different supervisors and then choose a supervisor and project for the next 3 years. ...
38
votes
5answers
30k views

Any ethical problems with dating a former student?

Assume the student recently graduated but works nearby; has not been my student for over 1 year; has never expressed any interest in dating until very recently; has a father who is a coworker at my ...
6
votes
6answers
2k views

My advisor wants to co-author a paper on my thesis work, but drags out the submission, claiming it isn't ready. Should I submit without him?

I have just finished my PhD thesis defense in applied mathematics. My supervisor suggested me the initial problem. He was not an expert in the small area that I was working, and thus the assistance ...
8
votes
2answers
767 views

Faculty criticizing students in front of other students

As a graduate student, I often discuss the performance and abilities of undergraduates in very frank terms with fellow graduate students. However, I would never do so in front of other undergraduates. ...
4
votes
4answers
2k views

How to avoid crossing my advisor if I write a paper as a sole author?

A bit of a controversial question here. I am a PhD student currently away from campus on an internship in another state (in the US). I left campus with my advisor-provided laptop and some dataset I ...
330
votes
12answers
51k views

I don't want to kill any more mice, but my advisor insists that I must in order to get my PhD

When my supervisor pitched the PhD to me, it was all about analyzing "big data". I had BSc/MSc experience in wet-lab biology (mainly culturing cells), however I wanted to branch out into ...
9
votes
1answer
1k views

How to confront new office mate regarding personal hygiene? [closed]

I am a senior graduate student and share an office with 3 other post-docs and graduate students. We recently had a first year graduate student join our lab for a rotation and he has been placed in ...
61
votes
11answers
11k views

My advisor demands second authorship, but my collaborator contributed much more than him. I don't want to be unethical, what should I do?

My PhD supervisor has contributed 0% to my research and he even does not know the basics of my research. On the other hand, I have a collaborator from another university who has contributed ...
9
votes
4answers
2k views

How to handle rude and distracting fellow graduate student who sits in the same office?

In a nutshell, I hate one of my fellow PhD students. I am sitting in the office with that fellow graduate student who frequently interrupts me when I want to focus on my work. He also often is very ...
208
votes
11answers
43k views

Have I embarassed my supervisors by solving a problem that a PhD student in my group was working on without success?

I'm a bachelor student in mathematics writing my thesis at a small university in the US. A PhD student that has the same supervisor has spent a very significant amount of time working exclusively on a ...
37
votes
3answers
4k views

Should I not hire someone who does not get along with me?

When I was doing my postdoc, there was a PhD student who shared the same office with me; he didn't get along very well with me or anyone in the office. He could be described as unfriendly and a little ...

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