Questions tagged [interpersonal-issues]

Questions concerning relationships and dealing with problems between people.

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13
votes
5answers
8k views

How should I address racist comments from a superior?

After finishing my master’s, I applied for a couple of positions, and the first interview I was invited to was at a renowned research institution in my field. I was living in our capital at that time ...
79
votes
10answers
20k views

I feel like male professors don't feel comfortable taking me as a student. How should I address this problem?

It has happened in many instances in my education that my male advisors or professors get very uncomfortable around me and some refuse to take me as their student. They tell me that in a decent way, ...
3
votes
0answers
419 views

How can I protect my research project from my ex-boyfriend with whom I had shared it with previously?

I am a new faculty member. My ex-boyfriend is an associate professor in a different research university but in the same field. When we were still together, I shared my research project (which I am ...
3
votes
0answers
228 views

How to respectfully “correct” my supervisor even though normally I'm the one who needs a lot of help?

TL;DR I have made little progress in the time I started working as a PhD student (few months) and I need a lot of help from my supervisor (the professor). I get the feeling that I - or my lack of ...
11
votes
1answer
1k views

How to approach my PhD advisor after failing a qualifiying exam?

I'm a first-year Ph.D. student in STEM who recently took their qualifying exams, in which we take two. I absolutely failed one and passed the other with flying colors (according to a faculty member). ...
22
votes
10answers
10k views

I've developed a close relationship with my past graduate teaching assistant, and I'm very interested in her: is it appropriate to pursue this?

The graduate teaching assistant I'm interested in taught one of my introductory courses. She needed research assistants, so I decided to join her lab. From all this we became very close. Ever since ...
1
vote
1answer
307 views

What should I do if a Professor yells at me and a fellow student in class?

So I'm taking a storyboarding class at my college and we have a big project coming up. I've been working on it a lot and talked about the story with my professor and he seemed to really enjoy it. We'...
2
votes
1answer
223 views

Do professors ever befriend former students? [closed]

A couple semesters ago I had a professor that had a pretty big impact on my academic career as well as my personal life. Through a series of events the professor came to know this and also come to ...
57
votes
11answers
17k views

My PI is publicly humiliating me: Why would a PI do this and what can I do to mitigate the damage from this?

My principal investigator (PI) and I tend to get along pretty well; however, he is often moody and has some quirks about him. Sometimes this means that he is in a bad mood and will take it out on me. ...
5
votes
1answer
618 views

How to ask my former PhD supervisor to stay away from me and do not contact my prospective new PhD supervisor?

There are a long list of stories about the issues with my PhD supervisor here in Academia.SE (see it here but these are not the only ones). So, I'm not going to repeat why I'm leaving my current ...
1
vote
1answer
206 views

Should I risk being fired to help the students? [closed]

I am a new high school teacher, and I want to disclose the risks and limitations of learning in a classroom to the students, but my supervisor said I cannot do this. Other teachers must have their ...
1
vote
1answer
199 views

What and how to write about these problems in my CV when I apply to phd program in Europe

I completed my Masters in mathematics in my home country (a developing country in Asia) in June 2020. I applied to 6 professors to do a PhD in the last semester of my Masters. I was rejected for 5 and ...
0
votes
3answers
321 views

I'm thinking about leaving after 6 months as a PhD student [closed]

I started last November but I've been having this gut feeling that this project may not be the one for me The big picture is that I'm not really happy with the theory- if I'm being totally honest with ...
2
votes
1answer
133 views

How should I present my work to my advisor? [closed]

I am a master student, working on something on my own. One day I came up a new definition (My field is mathematics) of something. I am not sure if it is publishable or not (Not even sure if it works). ...
10
votes
5answers
533 views

Will I be held responsible for working with a supervisor accused of sexual misconduct?

I am a first-year Ph.D. student. In the last year of my undergrad I began a research project with my then-advisor, who planned to hand me off to his former postdoc (let's call him John) who is tenured ...
1
vote
1answer
177 views

Bad experience with my PhD supervisor [closed]

Recently, I defended my PhD thesis in one of the universities in this "lovely" world. I was studying in a university out of my country, in a different environment, language, and culture. ...
17
votes
4answers
804 views

How to deal with unwanted physical contact, presents and attention by a postdoc supervisor?

Posting this to academia stackexchange, but if this may fit better in other place please let me know. My girlfriend is a new PhD student in a male dominated field, and is supervised by a postdoc in a ...
4
votes
1answer
223 views

Professor submitted my letter of recommendation after I removed him

I had sent a reminder to the professor for submitting my letter of recommendation about two days before the deadline, but he didn't reply to me. He was highly unresponsive after initially agreeing. As ...
4
votes
0answers
307 views

Laboratory second-in-command aggressive towards me

I am a Ph.D. student on a student residence permit in Germany, currently in the middle of my second year (out of three, but the project may be extended). There's a woman in the laboratory who ...
11
votes
3answers
817 views

How to deal with incommunicable co-author

The background: In the grand area of Mathematics in which I do research, there is a famous Professor, let us call him 'A', who started a joint project with another younger colleague, let us call him '...
23
votes
7answers
5k views

I found that a method I was hoping to publish is already known. What would be a proper way to retract emails sent to professors asking for help?

Continuation of this post. Basically, I emailed a publisher and two profs, asking for help on a paper I had written but not submitted. Turns out the method was not as novel as I thought, as an MSE ...
-1
votes
1answer
268 views

Interacting with Non-academics: How to Not Compromise One's Rigor? [closed]

This is a question about interacting with other people (in particular, non-academics). Hopefully, this is a common-enough problem that it is appropriate for this community. I consider myself an (...
12
votes
4answers
7k views

Is it a bad idea to ask my erstwhile PI to say in a recommendation letter he “forgot” to acknowledge me in a prior work?

Three years ago, I was an undergrad majoring in Biochemistry in a major US university, and did significant research work in preparation for my thesis. I am currently polishing a personal statement for ...
2
votes
2answers
306 views

Classmate shops my unpublished ideas around and contacts my advisors,

I'm about a year into some exciting research, with some early results that many professors are interested in following the progress of. I have two advisors. I recently learned that my graduate ...
1
vote
0answers
99 views

How to handle unresponsive ex-supervisor on the submission of an article?

During my master's, I had done a project which yielded some interesting results that I and my supervisor started to write up. I moved to a different university (and country) for my PhD and kept ...
2
votes
0answers
66 views

How do I tell my private teacher I want to stop learning subject with him/her [closed]

I would like to tell it politely, because there is a chance I will hire the teacher in the future. Now I just want to stop working with the teacher.
36
votes
1answer
7k views

My wife's contributions are not acknowledged in our group's paper that has me as coauthor. Should I speak up for her?

The background is that my wife and I are in the same lab. Recently our group did a paper together, and I am an author. However, my wife had contributed to draw a figure to a publication level. ...
25
votes
5answers
3k views

How to deal with unbalanced collaborations?

As a postdoc in a theoretical STEM field, I have had many wonderful collaborations where all authors contribute non-trivially to the final product. However, there was also many "unbalanced" ...
1
vote
1answer
97 views

How to reject an advisor for master's thessis?

(I could not find the same question. If this has been asked before please let me know.) I wrote an e-mail to a professor to be his student and he responded with his area of interests. Then I wrote for ...
34
votes
7answers
5k views

How to deal with animosity between different “factions” in a certain field?

In academia, there are sometimes sort of "feuds" between different researchers. For example, one such situation is described here: https://www.quora.com/Mathematicians-What-is-the-story-...
1
vote
1answer
190 views

How to deal with a mentor asking for sudden tasks

Consider the following conversation: Mentor: What is your progress? Me: blah.... blah... blah... Mentor: Okay. Me: What about other tasks (if any)? Mentor: Do not worry about them, I can handle, if ...
10
votes
1answer
573 views

PhD forced out of university: Hong Kong

(Too Long; Didnt Read members of academia.stackexchange, read the text in bold only) I am a PhD student in one of the Hong Kong Universities. For those that do not follow news, Hong Kong has been ...
3
votes
2answers
231 views

Can “revision authors” be dropped from a paper?

I have authored my first paper for a journal. I talked to some co-authors, hoping that they would help me with the design and intellectual work, but eventually their contribution has been minimal. I ...
2
votes
2answers
390 views

Peer shared with me “too much information” for a homework problem

In the summer, I took a math course where one of the homeworks involved a question where answers were expected to include several diagrams alongside an explanation. At the time, I thought it was a ...
5
votes
2answers
325 views

Fighting for academic fairness: My authorship is unaffected but my PhD advisor pushed up authorship of a co-author at the expense of other co-authors

I’m Nick, a postdoc currently working on publication of my PhD work. There are several authors on the paper - two former graduate students as co-first authors (myself and Aubrey), followed by five ...
13
votes
2answers
541 views

A group run by my advisor's former student keeps scooping my work. Is my advisor sabotaging me?

I'm worried that my advisor is sabotaging me either knowingly or unknowingly. I'm entering the 5th year of my PhD in a hard science. I had prior publications, but I have yet to publish any papers ...
2
votes
1answer
499 views

How to deal with an absentee Ph.D. advisor and selfish fellow Ph.D. student

I am a Ph.D. student in North America, I am three years into a four-year program. The relevant people in this story are my advisor (A), the other Ph.D. student in my group (B). A is a very well ...
6
votes
2answers
473 views

How to deal with student with low self-awareness about health condition?

Summary: Student got defensive when I suggested he might have some neurologial issue that should be checked, should I apologize or how to address the issue? I am a PhD student advising a student ...
-3
votes
1answer
312 views

Is it perceived poorly if a young master's student dates an undergraduate or occasionally attends a college party?

Someone mentioned that grad students who dated undergraduates are looked down upon and not invited to events. So, in your experience, are the younger grad/masters students (22-24?) who have dated ...
-3
votes
1answer
515 views

How to handle students' disrespectfulness?

Related with this problem: How to deal with unruly, unengaged students who complain about me? After the chairman spoke to me, I started talking to my students softly (more than needed). I tried many ...
11
votes
11answers
10k views

How to show special respect to a famous PhD advisor?

I am about to enter a 3-year PhD. Neither my bachelor’s nor my master’s were research-oriented nor very typical for my field, and I had to find a potential supervisor on my own. Due to my background, ...
3
votes
1answer
144 views

Accepted behaviour while working in international collaborations

How is getting-job-done outlook perceived in different parts of the academic world? In some parts of physics, I know a person who goes forward and suggests times and dates for meeting up for the ...
1
vote
1answer
202 views

How to handle one doctoral supervisor being unhappy over a doctoral student's preference for the other supervisor?

For my doctoral programme, I have 2 supervisors: 1 academic (i.e. a professor) and the other an industrial. Over the past few years I've found that my industrial supervisor isn't really able to ...
8
votes
2answers
423 views

Is it normal for master's students to be sidelined, compared to PhD students?

I'm a MS student who just finished his second semester. The lab that I'm in is fairly large (around 30 people) and there are a variety of students working on different topics. Here in my country (...
2
votes
2answers
404 views

My former post-doc host failed to credit my work in a paper - what to do?

I was employed as a post-doctoral fellow at some institute, and left it a couple of years ago. When I left, it was on ok terms with my host (= person who invited me and arranged for funding for my ...
-1
votes
2answers
526 views

What are the implications when a student takes a conflict to the chair?

Does writing to a Department Chair always have to result in a grievance and/or official investigation, or does the Chair ever help the parties work things out? I had originally posed this question ...
6
votes
2answers
3k views

What should I do if a group project member is not contributing anything but is also depressed?

I know these questions have been asked before but I would like some advice and perspectives on what I should do when mental health comes into the equation. The context is: an undergraduate class with ...
47
votes
13answers
15k views

Is it acceptable for a student to connect with a professor on LinkedIn?

Earlier in the semester, I was informed by both an advisor/academic counselor and a professor at my university that it is a good idea to connect with professors on LinkedIn if they have interests in ...
12
votes
2answers
2k views

Sharing with research team about being affected by a natural disaster

Is it professional enough to share personal worries with your research team and your supervisor where you are pursuing doctoral studies away from home and your hometown has been affected by a natural ...
4
votes
4answers
5k views

How can I salvage my relationship with a professor whom I lashed out against during a mental health episode? [closed]

After experiencing a lot of stress during my last undergraduate semester (and an episode of depression), I lashed out at a professor. I had made several rather foolish attempts to impress her and then ...

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