How should I deal with rejection from a place that, arguably, exploited me? [closed]

Question

Long story short, in September 2021, I was hired as an associate lecturer at a British university. I was headhunted for the position. Since I was about to finish my PhD and I needed some experience, I decided to put myself forward.

I covered for a colleague who was on research leave. I became the interim coordinator of the MA programme and took responsibility for all the teaching, MA supervision, and administrative work.

The Department repeatedly asked me for many favours (covering for colleagues on sick leave, taking on marking, etc.), usually at very short notice. I accepted, even at the expense of my mental health. I delivered. The students were very happy with my performance and both the head of the department and my colleague were complimentary to me.

So, in November 2022, the department decides to advertise a permanent position. My only colleague strongly encouraged me to apply. It was basically to do the same job I had been doing but permanently. I listened to my colleague and went for it.

A few weeks later, I was invited to interview. Both my colleague and the head of the department were in the panel. I attended the interview and answered all their questions. They said they were really impressed. However, after days of silence and deliberation, they decided to offer the job to someone else.

My colleague got in touch with me shortly afterwards to give me 'a massive thank you' and told me that the decision they had to make was very difficult. Apparently, I was a very close 'second'. I now feel upset and disappointed. I kept the programme running when no one else was available.

I've applied for jobs in the past. Sometimes, I made it to the interview stage. I've dealt with rejection before (it's part of the process), but the feeling here is quite different. I feel I've been let down. Am I being unreasonable?

Answer 1

You needed experience, you got experience. Sounds like a successful venture to me. You should probably make sure that experience is well represented in your application portfolio, hammering it home by lining up solid recommendations, and then continue applying for jobs.

Be wary of letting your disappointment trick you into burning your bridges.

Answer 2

This is quite common for UK Universities. They are under-resourced and run off staff goodwill. Covering for each other is a good strategy for established staff, but early career academics on precarious posts often find this exchange a little bit one-sided. You are right to feel let down. Many of your colleagues feel or felt the same at some point.

I am sorry you find yourself in this place. You are not alone.

Answer 3

You were hired in an interim basis to fulfil a job and you were paid to deliver. From the description you delivered well and even exceeded the job expectations. It is difficult to judge what is right or wrong about 'asked favours'. I would say it is inappropriate to expect that favours will ensure you getting a position that was transparently advertised and, hopefully, transparently granted.

How can you deal with it?

1. Make sure you get a comprehensive letter of recommendation that includes all your work delivered and even highlights the extra work you have done.

2. Remain on good terms with your superiors, finish your work professionally and let them know that you might provide their contact details as references for future job applications.

3. If you do not want to 'feel' exploited, set the boundaries of your job and please, do not compromise your mental health ever. Instead, identify tools to better deal with such situations. Whatever you can learn from your current employment will enrich your experience and prepare you better for future situations.

4. If you deliver 'extra' work, you might be entitled to ask for additional benefits such as a training course, etc. leading to a win-win situation.

Answer 4

I think that in the recent past your having filled in with aplomb would make you a shoe-in for that permanent vacancy.

But today there are so many candidates for each permanent vacancy that hiring departments can always go for the "fresh veg".

You are naturally aggrieved. While no quid pro quo was spelled out in relation to the permanent job, you did everything you could to show your loyalty and flexibility. What's more, you applied for the job after a specific request from a colleague acting on behalf of the department.

Ethically it's the equivalent of a breach-of-promise in the days of our grandparents. But you would be unfair to yourself to brood too much on these kind of people. You have to keep positive for the next opportunity and give the benefit of the doubt to the next potential employer. But you must also learn to protect your own emotional investment in a job and ensure you get what is merited from such commitment. Precisely how to do this is your own call but I imagine very frank conversations must be had before any effort "over and above the call of duty" is to be entertained again.

What deselected you was quite possibly the HoD (and his emissary "colleague" of yours) that didn't want to live with someone who got them out of an embarrassing academic situation rather than any superiority of the chosen candidate.

Right now it's little consolation to you but the carry-on of your last temporary employer will soon catch up with them.

Commiserations and I hope you have a Christmas free of stressful ingratitude.