Will it give a negative impression if a professor mentions that he declined a gift card from me in his reference letter?

Question

I am an international student studying in North america. I am applying for a master's program. I reached out to many professors for a letter of recommendation, but none replied. So, I told one professor that I would give him a small coffee gift card just for replying, regardless of whether he said yes or no. I now realize that I should not have done this.

The professor explained that I should never make such an offer and that he could not accept it. Still, he agreed to write the letter. However, he is going to mention this incident in the letter.

Is this gonna give the negative impression to people who review application? If so, should I ask someone else to write for me instead? It is hard to get people to reply to my requests.

Answer 1

Do not use this reference letter.

Depending on the exact information included and the phrasing used, there are two potential interpretations the reader could be left with.

Scenario A is that the reader gets the impression that you genuinely and purposefully tried to bribe the letter writer. This would such a drastic ethical transgression that I'd expect your application to be utterly rejected at this point.

Scenario B is more favourable to you: Here the reader believes (as I do based on your post) that you made a rather innocent mistake based on a lack of understanding of the relevant social norms. But then the letter writer is themselves unaware of the impact and meaning of your words, or they are trying to sabotage you. The most gracious reaction to that would be to disregard the entire letter.

So to summarize, the best plausible outcome of such a letter is that it gets ignored, at worst it will sink your entire application.

As already brought up in the comments and by Buffy, there is no tradition of "facilitation money" in "the West", including Canada. This would count as a bribe, and offering or accepting bribes is usually illegal. And if you actually want to try and get someone to risk their job and maybe even jail time, you'll have to offer way more than $25.

Answer 2

Your professor's actions seem very strange.

• If he believes that you were trying to bribe him, then he should have refused to write the letter.
• If he believes that this was a simple misunderstanding, then putting this in your letter seems like an inappropriate response. At most, the professor should disclose the incident in a footnote rather than describing the incident in the very first paragraph.

Is this gonna give the negative impression to people who review application?

It's more likely to give a negative impression of the professor. Unfortunately, since the professor is recommending you, this is not great for you either. Further, it creates a distraction: the committee will likely spend only a few minutes considering your application; you do not want them to spend their time discussing this irrelevant incident.

Still, the real question is: what are your other options?

• If you can find another professor who can write you an equally-strong recommendation, then of course you should do that. But I assume you are asking the question because you do not have many other options.
• In this case, I do not think using this professor's letter will be fatal for your application, and you may not have any choice (your application will be incomplete if you do not submit enough letters). It's probably a good idea to provide a brief (one-sentence) description of this incident providing your side of the story, but do not dwell on it; space spent describing this incident would be better spent describing your strong points.

Answer 3

Perhaps this is just a cultural misunderstanding. You don't write like a native Canadian, so I'll assume you are from another culture for this advice.

Different cultures have different practices and expectations around gifts. In Canada and the US, what you did seems like a bribe of some sort and your comments suggest that it was, at least, an inducement to answer you. I don't know if this would be natural in the place you were born or not.

But, one option you have, perhaps, is to go visit them in person and apologize for what you did and, assuming it is true, tell them that you just don't have enough experience with the local culture yet and ask them to forgive you for your actions. If they seem to accept the apology, you can then ask, again, for a letter.

It isn't something that would likely work with email, however.

But, yes, in Canada and the US, the interpretation would be negative at worst and puzzling at best. It just doesn't happen here.

Answer 4

Avoid using that reference unless it means you can't put in the application. It comes across as odd, and a reader will discount the letter.

If you have trouble getting professors to write you references, you could try making an appointment with the chair of your department (or a similar position) and ask them to help.

Explain the problem and the consequences (it makes it impossible for you to apply for positions). They may be able to find out why professors aren't responding to you when writing references for students is part of their job.

If these professors think they are too busy, then a department chair or dean can remind them they need to find the time. If they won't write because they feel they would have to write a mixed or negative letter, then you need to know that before you graduate.

There may also be an office of international students on your campus that could help you with the cultural niceties of references. I found references as they work in the USA very strange when I first moved here, and I imagine Canada will have its own specific culture too.

Answer 5

The incident of the gift card is one thing.

But if the professor is going to go further than that and actually mention this incident in your letter, do you really want that person speaking on your behalf in your application package?

This is like noticing any red flags on a job search. If a employer/advisor/boss engages in practices that you disagree with, why would you want to work with them? That professor is definitely doing something questionable and I would not want them to write a letter that is going to damage my chances of admission.

On the note of people not replying, professors are busy with tons of e-mails. So don't necessarily over-do it, but definitely follow up on e-mails when you can. Maybe go in person as well if it's possible.

Answer 6

This incident sounds to me like a simple misjudgment in relation to an intention to give a small gift as a thank-you. The inference to this being a bribe to influence a decision-maker is weak, since you offered it as a gift irrespective of the outcome of the decision of the professor, and the value was extremely small in relation to the earnings of the proposed recipient. As others have pointed out, it is strange and ethically-fraught to offer a gift in circumstances like this, but it sounds like you have already learned that.

Personally, I don't think the mention of this incident is likely to be harmful to your application, so long as there is a clear explanation of the details (including the mitigating parts) and the fact that you have learned not to do this since then. It is not unheard of for new students to be unfamiliar with the rules and customs around gratuities in universities, a fortiori if they are from another culture. The sole negative impression that this incident would give to me is that you came into the university somewhat naive and socially awkward in relation to how students should interact with their professors. If you decide you want to include the LOR that includes mention of this incident, then I would recommend you include a clear description of the incident in your own materials, and stress what you have learned from it.

Answer 7

My first thought would have been "do not use his letter", but I also feel like you don't have a lot of options. It's not easy.

1. I have a lot of experience with recommendation letters (requesting, writing, and reading). I have never, ever, seen (or made) any mention of attempted gifts in one of them. This would stand out like a sore thumb to a reader/recruiter. I can't predict the reaction, but it would be quite memorable.

2. The professor was right to refuse your offer and to help you understand how the system works. However, I find it extremely unlikely that you are the first one to make this mistake. Other professors (see #1) appear to have chosen not to mention anything. This means your professor does not think like most professors (let alone like most letter readers).

3. Thus, the issues with his letter (which you will never see) could be larger than just the mention of the "bribe" incident. I feel the most important question is: is the letter going to be strong? Will it describe your flaws in painstaking detail? Will it contain phrases like "Mia was the 15th out of 28 students in my class and her performance was acceptable"?

4. But again, this professor is the first person that even answers your request. You might be better off with a strong letter with a weird paragraph than without the letter.

My conclusion is that you should ask for a 10-minute meeting and try to be relatively direct. Maybe you should ask something like "Are you comfortable writing a strong letter?" You have little to lose. I hope this helps.

Answer 8

This is a really awkward position, for the both of you. If he considers this as a bribe, he is obligated to report it to the university and not mention in a recommendation letter... I think that he is trying to teach you something about the ethical value of that as an action. Also, I don't know how things work over there with the recommendation letters from previous employers and teachers, but I was in a deep hole when I was in college and even though I would pass my exams and barely get away with absences, none would give me any kind of recommendation and I would never blame them for that. What worked for me when I started looking for employment, if they had asked me for a letter, I would tell them the truth. Expose exactly who I was and how I was back then, but also the steps and leaps I had taken to turn my life around and be the man I am today. I am sure our cases are different, but what I was to tell you is that even if you have and interview, and you don't have a letter, explain to them why, expose your true self with all the feelings you have, all the shortcomings and anxiety, but also tell them what you have learned, how you deal with life, what you can offer them. I have finished psychology and I work at a big company that has nothing to do with that and also have friends in HR in high places. The meta has shifted, they are looking for people that know they have weaknesses and are actively try to work on these, they don't trust the perfect candidate. I don't know if I passed to you what I wanted you, my feelings tend to overtake me when I write. Best of luck nonetheless.