I have 2 options:
- I still have a very real chance to graduate with a (quite) legendary gpa, however this option is sort of throwing all of my eggs in one basket, as it makes me very committed (by limiting options) to continuing in academia.
- Doing a part-time internship (but 30 hours/week, I was shocked too). I consider this as a much safer option.
Truth be told I've made my decision on which option to take, but I couldn't make peace with myself about the decision. Not in which option to take, but in wanting to do both. Doing both is stupid, I had confirm this stupidity myself by asking a few people, and all agree that doing both is basically impossible.
However, this wouldn't be the first time I had to choose on something like this. The last I had to decide between two tasks to focus in, I attempted to focus on both. And stupidly, I was rewarded with being able to do both (in this sense, if you award 1 point for completing one of the tasks, last year I get ~1.7/2 points by doing both).
That was done by having 2-3 hours of sleep/night on average, sustained for a whole semester, and being a hermit in general. I do not wish to go through this again, especially since I have relationships that I wish to maintain. This idea of doing both, however, keeps on haunting me. Something like, "if you can do it last time, why not this time?".
As I already made my decision, my question is how to live with the decision? It has gotten to a point where it keeps on distracting me during class, and I slowly begin toying with the idea of doing both (which is BAD).