This question has been in my mind for about an year. Finally, I am asking it here. I don't know I would be getting knowledge about it anywhere else. I think it is on topic here. Kindly help.
I live in a 3rd world country which has a fascist culture. I am not one of the communities that is marginalized due to it, In a lot of spheres my community has an advantage due to the system, but in academia my community is also marginalized. Blasphemy is punishable by law here. Freedom of speech is also limited. I am atheist, rationalist and advocate of freedom of speech. I haven't read much about communism but I think it might be better If people of my country takes some of it's characteristics. I haven't told my views to anybody except my family. Communists are persecuted here. Fascism is rising again since 5 years , despite being from an operessor community my heart goes to the operessed. Academia and media is absolutely dominated by operessors. Minority religion have their own fascist leaders and ideology.
I have depression and skizoid personality disorder since 8 years , along with anger issues. Psycaterist is fine and helpful. But therapy is very poor. Health system in country is Kaput. This psycaterist which is good was found after I changed 3 other psycaterists. ( Greed in medical profession is very common in the country). I am in good mental health now. So, I studied a lot of self-help books myself. My parents haven't talked to me since a year because of my illness. My father was very distant and passive and mother is herself in depression and my brother is so addicted to netflix and online games that he is twenty years old and despite that spends 14-16 hours daily on mobile ignoring studies completely. No-one in family says him anything.
No-one in Academia in my country, talks about political situation be it STEM or humanities. Infact, a lot of academics that I know, regularly post on social media in favor of fascist leaders and their ideology.
I have done my masters in math and I am applying for Europe for PhD in session 2022. I teach school students part time and read advanced courses in math in the time left. I am hopeful that I will get a place if my health remains good and I don't become a target of fascists. I have worked extremely hard in my life till now given the scarce guidance that was available to me. I don't want to become a leader to bring a social change. I don't have resources or that much interest in politics. I am an introvert who never spoke even in an audience of 10 and have a very less social circle. There are at-least 2 -3 days in a week when I don't talk to anyone except students I teach. ( I work remotely). But when I read about history of my country and critique of social system, It really pained me that people are suffering so much and how deep fascism is in my country. I have stopped reading that and seeing tweets of recent hate crime incidents in my country and stopped reading philosophy or history or about commnism as I already suffer from mental health issues and law is against the victim in case of speech against religions and state and leaders and there is very less privacy in the country. I love math and this is what I want to do all my life. Few Professor which speak against the system are marginalized very quickly.
I am not adding any news items or articles about any of the incidents mentioned above as I want to be discreet.
** Question :How should in this case in a conservative and authoritarian society, I not get in trouble in academia as a student due to my political views and what should I avoid in order to continue my career? **
I think it is a really good idea to avoid discuss politics, read philosophy, history , see news of hate crimes
There is no prof. or my parents or any well -wisher to guide me. This question was on my mind since a year.
I shall be really thankful for any help recieved.