I'm a PhD student and I have published several good papers and achieved some awards and leadership position early in my career. I always celebrate my work but not boastfully since I poured in a lot of effort and hard work to create it.

But what really makes me glad about it is that many students in my University and young professionals become inspired and motivated by my perseverance and are encouraged to publish their own. Sometimes I even offer help and simple advice (e.g., how to deal with reviewers or prepare the manuscript for submission) to my fellows.

But recently, a group of my fellow students and my friends started to call me out, saying that I give them and others pressure to publish and I am inconsiderate about how they feel on their circumstances. They become resentful and there are days discredits my work. I did not mind it at first, but it is becoming frequent and I have become anxious and guilty about myself and my achievements.

So, I was wondering if ever I achieve something should I keep it on myself and only share to few people? Should I be felt guilty of achieving something on my work?

  • 1
    Neither should I keep [my achievements to] myself and only share to few people? nor [s]hould I [feel] guilty of achieving something...? seem like questions that are specific to academia. – user2768 Sep 12 '19 at 13:27
  • 1
    Should you feel guilty for achieving something? Surely you know the answer to that. This feels more like a rant than a question. – Spark Sep 12 '19 at 13:53
  • 1
    Perhaps you can just stop pressuring them. It isn't your achievements, but your actions. – Buffy Sep 12 '19 at 13:56
  • 3
    You shouldn’t apologize for doing well. You should probably watch that what you perceive as being helpful is not seen as patronizing or condescending by others. – Spark Sep 12 '19 at 13:59
  • 1
    What does "celebrate my work" mean exactly? – Elizabeth Henning Sep 12 '19 at 18:39

Everybody needs at least a few good personal allies to celebrate with---your advisor is hopefully one of those, and some of your close personal friends are likely to be as well.

Your peers in a graduate program, however, are likely to be in a more complex place emotionally. It's also easy to cross the line between sharing and bragging, and easy to come across as condescending (especially regarding "routine" tasks like preparing a manuscript or responding to reviewers).

Don't feel guilty about success, and don't hide your achievements. But I would also recommend holding back and waiting for your peers to ask you before sharing your news or offering to help.

Not the answer you're looking for? Browse other questions tagged or ask your own question.